Updated: Jan 25, 2021
So you go to a wedding for a close family member. Everybody looks wonderful in their finest attire. Somebody went to a lot of trouble to put this event together and the bride and groom are front and center for all to see. Much of what they have to say is in response to questions and phrases that are posed and delivered by the Justice of the Peace, Member of the Clergy or whoever is officiating for the day. At certain critical junctures of the ceremony you are anxious to hear a certain responses, yet you can’t hear a damn thing. Did they say ‘I do’ or “F” You’? You came all this way for the opportunity to hear nothing. The funny thing is they have been in a similar situation where they have heard nothing, and it appears they thought it was a good idea to return the favor.
Unless they have a microphone for a voice, why don’t they have a microphone and, for that matter, why do you have to strain to hear all other words as well? But it doesn’t stop there because when you proceed to the reception that follows this or any other event, you frequently can’t hear things that are being said by people that hold the microphone (if there is one) two feet from their mouth. They spent all that time thinking about, writing and fretting over a speech, shitting their pants as the minutes tick away before they are to deliver it, then capping it all off by saying or mumbling lord knows what that can only be heard by those that are within earshot of the person who is delivering it.
You would think that for all the money, time, and preparation that is spent in preparation for a lifetime event, great care and consideration would be given to that aspect of the ceremony that relates to hearing what the hell is going on. Either do it right or hire a professional as a stand-in or proxy with full power of attorney to fulfill what you are obviously unable to competently do on your own.